1 00:00:05,781 --> 00:00:06,941 Look at me, right? 2 00:00:07,901 --> 00:00:09,541 And look at the Queen. 3 00:00:09,621 --> 00:00:14,141 I was never a fan until it occurred to me how much me and Ma'am have in common. 4 00:00:14,221 --> 00:00:16,501 Bringing up kiddies you can't remember the names of. 5 00:00:16,581 --> 00:00:20,181 I know she's not a single parent, but she might as well be. 6 00:00:20,261 --> 00:00:23,101 Plus, the pair of us, we've stuck to our guns, 7 00:00:23,181 --> 00:00:26,861 her literally sometimes, and flagshipped a dying breed. 8 00:00:26,940 --> 00:00:29,221 Admired and despised equally. 9 00:00:29,300 --> 00:00:34,821 Not for never lifting a finger, no, for setting examples through extremity. 10 00:00:34,900 --> 00:00:37,421 And whether you're a bigwig on her end or a bigwig on mine, 11 00:00:37,501 --> 00:00:39,701 you've still got all your dickheads in the middle to deal with, 12 00:00:39,781 --> 00:00:41,540 snip, snip, snipping at your benefits. 13 00:00:41,621 --> 00:00:46,341 I mean, she can't not be looking at me and thinking, "What's your secret, Frank?" 14 00:00:46,421 --> 00:00:49,181 I got shot of my kids yonks back, 15 00:00:49,260 --> 00:00:51,260 whereas she's yet to see the back of a single one. 16 00:00:51,341 --> 00:00:52,461 Fine! 17 00:00:52,540 --> 00:00:54,781 I've had to get out of bed on occasion to make ends meet, 18 00:00:54,860 --> 00:00:58,061 whereas she, she's done the whole thing from a chair. 19 00:01:00,061 --> 00:01:01,620 Oh, and a drink for the lady. 20 00:01:01,701 --> 00:01:03,260 Oh, sure, there's perks. 21 00:01:03,341 --> 00:01:06,661 But, look at her lot. Brian May prancing about on her roof. 22 00:01:06,741 --> 00:01:09,140 Now, look at my lot, 23 00:01:09,221 --> 00:01:13,221 we know how to throw a proper fucking pa-a-rty! 24 00:01:21,341 --> 00:01:24,741 [Lip] It's not that hard being a parent in the modern world. 25 00:01:24,821 --> 00:01:26,821 It's not like the caveman times. 26 00:01:26,901 --> 00:01:30,060 Back then you'd be protecting your kids from rampaging tribesmen 27 00:01:30,140 --> 00:01:32,181 and sabre-toothed tigers. 28 00:01:33,181 --> 00:01:34,700 Or the medieval ages, 29 00:01:34,780 --> 00:01:38,140 where if infant mortality didn't snatch the little buggers off, 30 00:01:38,220 --> 00:01:40,220 then the Black Death were hammering on the door. 31 00:01:42,140 --> 00:01:44,261 Nah, now it's easier. 32 00:01:44,341 --> 00:01:48,261 Sure you have to make a few sacrifices, but it's nothing like the past. 33 00:01:48,341 --> 00:01:52,420 As long as you have a bit of spare cash to buy them clothes and shit, 34 00:01:52,500 --> 00:01:54,500 make sure there's food on the table... 35 00:01:56,780 --> 00:01:59,621 and be there for them when they need it, you're sorted. 36 00:02:01,580 --> 00:02:04,741 Basically, don't be a knobhead and you'll be fine. 37 00:02:06,580 --> 00:02:09,301 [rock music plays] 38 00:02:12,421 --> 00:02:14,021 Billy Whizz! 39 00:02:14,100 --> 00:02:15,820 There you go! 40 00:02:18,861 --> 00:02:20,661 [rooster crowing] 41 00:02:20,741 --> 00:02:22,501 [cow mooing] 42 00:02:22,581 --> 00:02:24,741 It's not some big mystery, is it? 43 00:02:26,260 --> 00:02:29,741 So how come so many of the twats fuck it up, eh? 44 00:02:42,861 --> 00:02:44,820 Oi! Hands off. 45 00:02:44,901 --> 00:02:45,980 Just looking. 46 00:02:46,061 --> 00:02:47,301 Just touching! 47 00:02:47,380 --> 00:02:49,221 You running away from home? 48 00:02:49,301 --> 00:02:51,781 Overnight excursions with the Scouts. 49 00:02:51,861 --> 00:02:57,260 Pitch a tent, build a fire, underneath that old wandering star. 50 00:02:57,341 --> 00:02:58,301 Can I come? 51 00:02:58,380 --> 00:03:00,341 -You're not a Scout. -I could be one. 52 00:03:00,421 --> 00:03:04,941 Never been in a tent or built a fire or seen a wandering star. 53 00:03:08,581 --> 00:03:11,061 [indistinct conversations] 54 00:03:22,141 --> 00:03:23,461 [bus bell rings] 55 00:03:46,021 --> 00:03:48,021 [hard rock music plays] 56 00:03:48,100 --> 00:03:50,420 I've got Billy doing the school pics for me. 57 00:03:50,501 --> 00:03:54,700 There's a class set, individual pics and a family group. 58 00:03:54,781 --> 00:03:56,741 Doesn't matter how bleeding ugly the kids are, 59 00:03:56,820 --> 00:03:59,221 the parents will buy the lot. 60 00:03:59,301 --> 00:04:00,661 Pint, please, Karen. 61 00:04:00,741 --> 00:04:03,901 Eh, Gallagher, you'll need a sick note for skipping work today. 62 00:04:03,980 --> 00:04:05,781 Eh, I was mugged. 63 00:04:05,860 --> 00:04:06,781 Who'd mug you? 64 00:04:06,860 --> 00:04:07,781 Well, they took the lot. 65 00:04:07,860 --> 00:04:10,181 I didn't even have the bus fare to get back home. 66 00:04:10,260 --> 00:04:12,021 Don't care. 67 00:04:12,100 --> 00:04:13,181 £2.50. 68 00:04:13,260 --> 00:04:15,181 Muggers took you for a trip out, did they? 69 00:04:15,260 --> 00:04:16,620 From the hospital. 70 00:04:16,701 --> 00:04:19,500 Hang on. You left here last night with fuck all. 71 00:04:19,581 --> 00:04:24,261 You still owe me for six pints and two Es. So clear your tab or no more. 72 00:04:24,341 --> 00:04:27,141 [sighs] Fine. 73 00:04:27,221 --> 00:04:29,541 Mimi, payday's not till you know, any chance? 74 00:04:29,620 --> 00:04:30,541 End of the month. 75 00:04:30,620 --> 00:04:34,941 Oh, fine! Abandoned. An outcast. 76 00:04:35,021 --> 00:04:36,221 Oh, God! 77 00:04:36,301 --> 00:04:37,940 Who's going to look after you in your old age? 78 00:04:38,021 --> 00:04:40,141 I've still got my dignity. 79 00:04:40,221 --> 00:04:42,021 Whoa, whoa, pal, that's mine now. 80 00:04:42,101 --> 00:04:43,620 Get off, you baghead, get off! 81 00:04:43,701 --> 00:04:44,740 Get off! 82 00:04:48,301 --> 00:04:49,940 Dignity my arse. 83 00:04:53,821 --> 00:04:55,461 [bus approching] 84 00:04:59,861 --> 00:05:01,581 [bus door swoosh] 85 00:05:02,341 --> 00:05:03,661 Hiya! 86 00:05:06,021 --> 00:05:07,101 G'us your bag then. 87 00:05:07,180 --> 00:05:08,500 -Good day at the office? [Katie] Yeah. 88 00:05:11,901 --> 00:05:13,781 Why not? It's just Scouts. 89 00:05:13,861 --> 00:05:15,060 [both] It's just Scouts! 90 00:05:15,141 --> 00:05:16,101 Shut up! 91 00:05:16,180 --> 00:05:17,581 It's sinister! 92 00:05:17,661 --> 00:05:20,740 Making you dress all the same, act the same way. 93 00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:22,821 Little robots with woggles. 94 00:05:22,901 --> 00:05:24,620 You'll thank me one day. 95 00:05:24,701 --> 00:05:26,421 I just want you kids to be, you know-- 96 00:05:26,500 --> 00:05:27,461 Individuals. 97 00:05:27,541 --> 00:05:28,541 To follow your own path. 98 00:05:28,620 --> 00:05:29,661 Dance to the beat of your drum. 99 00:05:29,740 --> 00:05:30,821 Blah, blah, blah, blah. 100 00:05:30,901 --> 00:05:31,981 OK! 101 00:05:32,060 --> 00:05:33,981 But I'm still right. 102 00:05:34,060 --> 00:05:37,861 But I know the path I want to follow, I want to be a Scout! 103 00:05:37,940 --> 00:05:40,180 [all] I want to be a Scout! 104 00:05:43,301 --> 00:05:45,021 [people chattering] 105 00:05:45,661 --> 00:05:46,861 But please, Dad! 106 00:05:49,101 --> 00:05:50,021 Lip! 107 00:05:50,101 --> 00:05:51,541 Frank. 108 00:05:51,620 --> 00:05:52,940 Not your neck of the woods. 109 00:05:54,981 --> 00:05:57,861 Well, you know, call it fate. Kismet. 110 00:05:57,940 --> 00:06:00,261 So you're looking good. Suit, tie. 111 00:06:00,341 --> 00:06:02,301 It's called having a job, Frank. 112 00:06:02,380 --> 00:06:04,461 Architect, for the council. 113 00:06:05,701 --> 00:06:06,821 And we're in a bit of a hurry. 114 00:06:06,901 --> 00:06:08,901 Those buildings won't build themselves. 115 00:06:08,981 --> 00:06:10,901 I've seen you before. 116 00:06:10,981 --> 00:06:11,940 On the bus. 117 00:06:12,021 --> 00:06:13,180 Yeah, I thought you were a boy. 118 00:06:13,261 --> 00:06:14,180 Thank you. 119 00:06:14,261 --> 00:06:17,620 Eh, what'd we say about talking to strangers? 120 00:06:17,701 --> 00:06:20,581 And there's no-one more strange than your old grandad, eh, Katie? 121 00:06:20,661 --> 00:06:21,620 No way! 122 00:06:21,701 --> 00:06:23,380 [Frank giggles] 123 00:06:23,461 --> 00:06:24,781 It's a miracle? 124 00:06:24,861 --> 00:06:27,341 -Well, wouldn't go that far, you know. -It is. 125 00:06:27,421 --> 00:06:29,341 We thought the Taliban would never let you go. 126 00:06:29,421 --> 00:06:31,180 [Lip] Yes, Grandad. 127 00:06:31,261 --> 00:06:33,901 We didn't know if you was dead or alive. 128 00:06:37,581 --> 00:06:38,701 [kids cheering] 129 00:06:38,781 --> 00:06:40,461 Grandad, watch! 130 00:06:42,380 --> 00:06:45,701 Oh, yeah, brilliant, kid, brilliant! 131 00:06:45,781 --> 00:06:50,301 [Lip] How much for you to piss off and leave us alone? 132 00:06:50,380 --> 00:06:52,781 That's no way to speak to a war hero. 133 00:06:52,861 --> 00:06:54,820 Go on. Take it. 134 00:06:54,901 --> 00:06:58,180 Piss off back down the Jockey, go and have yourself some fun. 135 00:06:58,261 --> 00:07:00,500 Don't bother coming back round these ways ever again. 136 00:07:00,581 --> 00:07:02,940 Oh, you do live round here then? 137 00:07:03,021 --> 00:07:04,581 Just visiting. 138 00:07:04,661 --> 00:07:05,701 Work. 139 00:07:09,740 --> 00:07:11,060 I'm not after your money. 140 00:07:11,141 --> 00:07:12,101 [Lip chuckles] 141 00:07:12,180 --> 00:07:16,101 What, is it so far-fetched that I might miss my grandson-- daughter? 142 00:07:16,180 --> 00:07:18,940 About as far-fetched as Liverpool or Santa Claus 143 00:07:19,021 --> 00:07:20,701 winning the bloody Premier League. 144 00:07:20,781 --> 00:07:25,141 Oh, as far-fetched as me being captured by the Taliban then? 145 00:07:25,221 --> 00:07:28,620 Course, the SAS are dying to recruit blokes like me, you know. 146 00:07:28,701 --> 00:07:30,221 Catering staff. 147 00:07:30,301 --> 00:07:32,301 You were Army catering staff. 148 00:07:32,380 --> 00:07:34,701 You got kidnapped by mistake. 149 00:07:34,781 --> 00:07:39,500 The Taliban were so fucking embarrassed they didn't know what to do with you. 150 00:07:39,581 --> 00:07:41,301 You see, Frank? 151 00:07:41,380 --> 00:07:46,820 Even in the silliest little lie, I told my daughter you're still a loser. 152 00:07:52,341 --> 00:07:54,221 Well, fair enough. 153 00:07:56,820 --> 00:07:57,901 Katie! 154 00:07:57,981 --> 00:08:02,541 Your dad wants to know if you want to come back to mine, for dinner, fish and chips! 155 00:08:02,620 --> 00:08:04,661 Brilliant, kid, brilliant! 156 00:08:04,740 --> 00:08:05,740 [Frank laughs] 157 00:08:05,820 --> 00:08:09,260 D'you hear that? Eh? Out of the mouths of babes. 158 00:08:09,341 --> 00:08:11,180 You might want to stop off at the cash machine, 159 00:08:11,260 --> 00:08:13,421 you know, price of a fish supper nowadays and all that. 160 00:08:19,101 --> 00:08:20,301 You all right, Frank? 161 00:08:20,380 --> 00:08:21,541 [Frank] No! 162 00:08:21,620 --> 00:08:23,221 Frank? 163 00:08:36,580 --> 00:08:38,781 [clattering] 164 00:08:45,821 --> 00:08:48,100 Don't just stand there, place won't clean itself. 165 00:08:48,181 --> 00:08:49,541 God, I've got to do everything myself. 166 00:08:49,621 --> 00:08:51,421 Didn't know the Social were coming. 167 00:08:51,501 --> 00:08:53,141 They're not. It's Lip. 168 00:08:53,220 --> 00:08:54,661 Lip, like my brother Lip? 169 00:08:54,741 --> 00:08:56,501 Yes. He who never visits. 170 00:08:56,581 --> 00:08:58,541 Him and his kid, Katie. They'll be here in a minute. 171 00:08:58,621 --> 00:08:59,541 -[door rattles] -What's up? 172 00:08:59,621 --> 00:09:02,861 And if asked, I've been away, locked up by the Taliban. 173 00:09:02,941 --> 00:09:04,501 Frank, what have you done now? 174 00:09:04,581 --> 00:09:06,861 Not me. It's Lip, it's his story. 175 00:09:06,941 --> 00:09:09,781 He's had me Terry waited up in some far-flung land. 176 00:09:09,861 --> 00:09:11,421 Why would he say that? 177 00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:15,261 I dunno. 178 00:09:16,501 --> 00:09:18,220 Takes all sorts, I suppose. 179 00:09:18,980 --> 00:09:20,821 [utensils clinking] 180 00:09:20,901 --> 00:09:26,340 Right, go to mine, get coffee, not a jar, the good Yemeni stuff. 181 00:09:26,421 --> 00:09:29,340 It's the only thing strong enough to cover up this stench! 182 00:09:31,661 --> 00:09:32,661 [clatters] 183 00:09:32,741 --> 00:09:33,701 Is he nice? 184 00:09:33,781 --> 00:09:37,821 He's got a heart of gold. 185 00:09:37,901 --> 00:09:39,781 I'm sure if you remind him 186 00:09:39,860 --> 00:09:42,581 of all the birthdays and Christmases that he's missed, 187 00:09:42,661 --> 00:09:45,501 y'know, he might, y'know give us-- 188 00:09:45,581 --> 00:09:48,100 give you a little something for your piggy bank. 189 00:09:53,301 --> 00:09:55,061 [door rattles] 190 00:09:55,781 --> 00:09:57,301 [door closes] 191 00:09:57,381 --> 00:09:58,941 Hey, Jamie, I'm in training. 192 00:09:59,021 --> 00:10:00,741 Oh, yeah, what for? 193 00:10:00,821 --> 00:10:03,340 Camping. I got in the Scouts. 194 00:10:03,421 --> 00:10:05,621 I have to carry my own tent. 195 00:10:05,701 --> 00:10:06,821 What's your first mission then? 196 00:10:08,261 --> 00:10:11,220 Climbing Everest or surviving the Sahara? 197 00:10:11,301 --> 00:10:12,741 Remona's taking us to a field. 198 00:10:12,821 --> 00:10:14,421 Ooh, how exciting. 199 00:10:14,501 --> 00:10:17,061 Y'know this bag's dead heavy? 200 00:10:17,141 --> 00:10:18,100 I believe you, mate. 201 00:10:18,181 --> 00:10:20,381 Uncle Jamie, were you ever in the Scouts? 202 00:10:20,460 --> 00:10:23,301 Me and our Shane chucked fireworks at the Scout hall once. 203 00:10:23,381 --> 00:10:24,460 About as close as I got. 204 00:10:25,501 --> 00:10:27,340 I don't think they could handle your Uncle Jamie. 205 00:10:27,421 --> 00:10:29,181 What do you mean? 206 00:10:29,261 --> 00:10:31,941 I'm more of a leader than a follower. 207 00:10:37,141 --> 00:10:39,621 [women quarrelling] 208 00:10:42,621 --> 00:10:43,661 Fuck off! 209 00:10:43,741 --> 00:10:45,581 What was it like here when you were little? 210 00:10:47,220 --> 00:10:48,821 It was nice. 211 00:10:48,901 --> 00:10:50,460 [glass shattering] 212 00:10:53,381 --> 00:10:54,501 [indistinct talk] 213 00:10:56,340 --> 00:10:57,460 [tyres screeching] 214 00:11:00,941 --> 00:11:01,901 [man] Fucking rats! 215 00:11:01,980 --> 00:11:03,860 [engine revving] 216 00:11:03,941 --> 00:11:05,740 It's not very nice now. 217 00:11:07,021 --> 00:11:08,821 Places change, sweetheart. 218 00:11:08,901 --> 00:11:10,701 So, why does Grandad stay here? 219 00:11:10,781 --> 00:11:13,941 Well, the country doesn't look after war veterans as well as it should do. 220 00:11:14,021 --> 00:11:15,621 It's a shame for Grandad. 221 00:11:15,701 --> 00:11:17,941 Yeah, a real shame. 222 00:11:24,821 --> 00:11:25,860 Dad? 223 00:11:31,181 --> 00:11:32,301 [thud] 224 00:11:33,661 --> 00:11:36,740 [tyres screeching] 225 00:11:36,821 --> 00:11:37,821 [knocking on door] 226 00:11:41,740 --> 00:11:42,740 Eh, come in. 227 00:11:44,860 --> 00:11:45,901 Welcome home. 228 00:11:51,941 --> 00:11:53,460 [door closes] 229 00:11:55,740 --> 00:11:57,340 Hi, I'm Esther. 230 00:11:57,421 --> 00:11:58,821 Oh. Are you, uh? 231 00:11:58,901 --> 00:12:00,061 God, no. 232 00:12:00,141 --> 00:12:01,460 Next door, just the neighbour. 233 00:12:01,541 --> 00:12:03,621 And besides, I'm totally out of his league. 234 00:12:03,701 --> 00:12:08,541 This is thingy, a stray we've acquired along the way. 235 00:12:08,621 --> 00:12:11,021 Aidan. Pleased to meet you, sir. 236 00:12:11,100 --> 00:12:12,220 Allow me. 237 00:12:14,421 --> 00:12:16,141 And Stella. 238 00:12:16,220 --> 00:12:17,181 Your sister. 239 00:12:23,581 --> 00:12:24,541 Hello. 240 00:12:24,621 --> 00:12:26,340 It's really nice to meet you. 241 00:12:26,421 --> 00:12:28,061 Sorry it's taken so long. 242 00:12:28,141 --> 00:12:30,100 Dad said you'll give me a little money. 243 00:12:32,301 --> 00:12:34,141 Where do they get this stuff, eh? 244 00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:36,860 Well, it must run in the family. 245 00:12:39,381 --> 00:12:40,860 So, how does it feel to be home? 246 00:12:40,941 --> 00:12:44,460 [Mimi] I've asked you ten times before, Gallagher. 247 00:12:44,541 --> 00:12:46,220 -Nana! -Katie, wait, please. 248 00:12:47,781 --> 00:12:50,821 [Mimi] And none of your half-hearted forgeries! 249 00:12:50,901 --> 00:12:52,860 What are you doing here, sweetheart? 250 00:12:52,941 --> 00:12:55,181 I'm not due to see you till next week. 251 00:12:56,781 --> 00:12:58,781 What's going on, Lip? 252 00:12:58,860 --> 00:13:00,901 Oh, just back for the job, is it? 253 00:13:00,980 --> 00:13:01,980 Dad... 254 00:13:03,781 --> 00:13:05,021 please. 255 00:13:05,100 --> 00:13:07,021 For Katie. 256 00:13:07,100 --> 00:13:10,301 Happy families. With her, Granny Shankly? She's better than me! 257 00:13:10,381 --> 00:13:11,421 Don't. 258 00:13:11,501 --> 00:13:13,740 You never told me you lived near Grandad! 259 00:13:13,821 --> 00:13:15,301 No, I didn't, because-- 260 00:13:15,381 --> 00:13:17,261 The Taliban? 261 00:13:17,340 --> 00:13:19,100 Yeah, those fellas. 262 00:13:19,181 --> 00:13:20,821 [shuts the door] 263 00:13:20,901 --> 00:13:22,301 Well, you know... 264 00:13:23,661 --> 00:13:27,261 maybe it's time we told the truth. 265 00:13:27,340 --> 00:13:31,340 You know, Gallaghers' name stands for something, doesn't it? 266 00:13:31,421 --> 00:13:33,781 Integrity. Honesty. 267 00:13:37,501 --> 00:13:40,021 Look, love. Look. 268 00:13:41,021 --> 00:13:44,021 -I was never captured by the Taliban. -But Dad-- 269 00:13:44,100 --> 00:13:45,740 No, no, it's not your dad's fault. 270 00:13:45,821 --> 00:13:48,821 Couldn't tell anyone the story. 271 00:13:48,901 --> 00:13:51,661 [sighs] 272 00:13:51,740 --> 00:13:55,821 I was on a mission to find a man, a very bad man. 273 00:13:57,740 --> 00:14:00,301 Do you know who Osama bin Laden is? 274 00:14:02,980 --> 00:14:04,781 Grandad! 275 00:14:06,980 --> 00:14:08,021 Yeah. 276 00:14:10,021 --> 00:14:11,941 Bin Laden. 277 00:14:12,021 --> 00:14:13,220 Seriously? 278 00:14:13,301 --> 00:14:15,661 Well, you started it with your tall tales of the Taliban. 279 00:14:15,740 --> 00:14:18,740 How long do you think she's going to buy into that hero bullshit? 280 00:14:18,821 --> 00:14:19,740 Dunno. 281 00:14:19,821 --> 00:14:21,021 You used to believe in the Tooth Fairy till you were 11. 282 00:14:21,100 --> 00:14:22,061 Oh, fuck off. 283 00:14:22,141 --> 00:14:23,100 And you wet the bed. 284 00:14:23,181 --> 00:14:26,301 Or shall I just tell her the real truth? Her dad's a big fat liar. 285 00:14:26,381 --> 00:14:27,460 One more word. 286 00:14:27,541 --> 00:14:30,541 [Mimi] One more word from either of you and I'll be cracking skulls. 287 00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:33,100 You're not ruining this for me. 288 00:14:33,181 --> 00:14:34,100 It's good you're here though. 289 00:14:34,181 --> 00:14:35,421 Yeah, fantastic. 290 00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:36,860 'Cause it's nearly done. 291 00:14:36,941 --> 00:14:40,301 I'll nip next door and get it while she's still playing. 292 00:14:40,381 --> 00:14:41,541 Cilla, come on, babe. 293 00:14:43,220 --> 00:14:44,261 Pop home. 294 00:14:46,860 --> 00:14:49,381 [door rattles] 295 00:14:49,460 --> 00:14:51,980 And what treat is Super Gran looking to spring? 296 00:14:52,061 --> 00:14:55,541 She's altering Mandy's old Communion dress for Katie's confirmation. 297 00:14:55,620 --> 00:14:56,901 It means a lot to her. 298 00:14:56,980 --> 00:14:59,100 How does she get her trotters to hold the little needles? 299 00:14:59,181 --> 00:15:02,301 If that's the way she chooses to grieve, who am I to stop her? 300 00:15:02,381 --> 00:15:06,541 Well, my invitation must have got lost, so let me RSVP in person. 301 00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:10,460 [burps] 302 00:15:10,541 --> 00:15:11,581 If you're offering. 303 00:15:13,100 --> 00:15:14,460 [Katie] But you can't be my auntie. 304 00:15:14,541 --> 00:15:15,460 [Stella] But I am. 305 00:15:15,541 --> 00:15:16,620 [Katie] But you're younger than me. 306 00:15:16,701 --> 00:15:18,740 [Stella] Cilla's your auntie as well, you know. 307 00:15:18,821 --> 00:15:20,340 Do you live nearby? 308 00:15:20,421 --> 00:15:22,581 Took us four buses to get here. 309 00:15:24,100 --> 00:15:27,100 Hey, I know the transport system's fucked but you're only ten minutes away. 310 00:15:27,181 --> 00:15:28,381 I took her the long way round, 311 00:15:28,460 --> 00:15:31,781 so she knows exactly how far away Grandad lives. 312 00:15:31,860 --> 00:15:36,541 So enjoy it while it lasts because we're a long way from home. 313 00:15:52,301 --> 00:15:53,661 [boy] Hey! What's up? 314 00:15:54,941 --> 00:15:58,620 I don't know what this whole badass routine is about, Blanco. 315 00:15:58,701 --> 00:16:00,220 But it doesn't suit you. 316 00:16:00,301 --> 00:16:02,701 Maybe I don't want to be like everyone else. 317 00:16:02,781 --> 00:16:04,941 Go and get the rest of your uniform! 318 00:16:06,220 --> 00:16:07,620 [kid] Go, go, go, go. 319 00:16:09,460 --> 00:16:10,581 [Stella giggles] 320 00:16:14,301 --> 00:16:15,901 Did they torture you? 321 00:16:15,980 --> 00:16:19,620 Oh, they did unspeakable things. 322 00:16:19,701 --> 00:16:21,061 Like what? 323 00:16:21,141 --> 00:16:22,901 You're a right little tom boy, aren't you? 324 00:16:22,980 --> 00:16:24,661 No, she's not. It's a phase. 325 00:16:25,740 --> 00:16:27,860 Maybe if her gran was allowed to spend more time with her, 326 00:16:27,941 --> 00:16:29,340 she wouldn't feel the need to act up so much. 327 00:16:29,421 --> 00:16:30,421 She's not acting up! 328 00:16:30,500 --> 00:16:32,380 Really? When did she last wear a dress? Make-up? 329 00:16:32,460 --> 00:16:33,380 Not this again. 330 00:16:33,460 --> 00:16:35,860 Oh, for God's sake, Lip, she hasn't even got her ears pierced. 331 00:16:35,941 --> 00:16:36,941 She's nine, y'know. 332 00:16:37,021 --> 00:16:37,941 I think we best be getting back. 333 00:16:38,021 --> 00:16:40,061 Sit down, there's no rush. 334 00:16:40,141 --> 00:16:41,781 I'll put the kettle on. 335 00:16:41,860 --> 00:16:45,941 Katie, tell your dad how you're glad to spend a little more time with your gran. 336 00:16:46,021 --> 00:16:47,021 [Frank clears throat] 337 00:16:47,100 --> 00:16:49,141 And your granddad. 338 00:16:49,220 --> 00:16:51,860 Please, Dad, can we? Please? 339 00:16:51,941 --> 00:16:53,220 Please? 340 00:16:53,301 --> 00:16:54,220 Course you can. 341 00:16:54,301 --> 00:16:57,701 You can visit any time you want, now that your grandad's home. 342 00:16:59,261 --> 00:17:02,181 [door rattles] 343 00:17:03,541 --> 00:17:07,221 Granny Maguire seems pretty determined to keep you here. 344 00:17:07,301 --> 00:17:08,380 She's got an agenda, that one. 345 00:17:08,461 --> 00:17:09,701 And you don't? 346 00:17:09,781 --> 00:17:11,021 Eh, I'm on your side. 347 00:17:11,100 --> 00:17:13,420 -You have never been on my side. -Oh, fuck. 348 00:17:13,501 --> 00:17:17,541 Y'know what, just go and take a walk, cool down or you'll blow a fucking gasket, 349 00:17:17,620 --> 00:17:19,900 and you don't want to do that in front of your kids, messes 'em up. 350 00:17:19,981 --> 00:17:21,620 You're giving me parenting advice? 351 00:17:21,701 --> 00:17:23,340 [Frank sighs] 352 00:17:23,420 --> 00:17:26,501 Katie, darling, your dad's going to have to stretch his legs, love. 353 00:17:26,581 --> 00:17:28,140 You'll be alright here with Stella. 354 00:17:29,821 --> 00:17:31,341 Pick us up 40 fags while you're out. 355 00:17:36,940 --> 00:17:38,461 No broken home to go back to? 356 00:17:38,541 --> 00:17:39,741 Fuck off, paedo! 357 00:17:44,341 --> 00:17:46,581 Bad news, my little Bandita. 358 00:17:46,660 --> 00:17:48,660 Permission for take off's been denied. 359 00:17:50,541 --> 00:17:55,021 No, I've got the money, it's just my time that's being pillaged. 360 00:17:55,101 --> 00:17:56,981 Me son's coming round, 361 00:17:57,061 --> 00:17:59,821 just invited himself without any thought how it might disrupt my day. 362 00:17:59,900 --> 00:18:01,341 You know how selfish kids can be. 363 00:18:02,381 --> 00:18:04,261 Yeah. I'll call to reschedule. 364 00:18:06,221 --> 00:18:07,900 Will you two stop that? 365 00:18:07,981 --> 00:18:10,461 Or I'll kick your fucking heads in! 366 00:18:10,541 --> 00:18:11,621 [kid groans] 367 00:18:12,781 --> 00:18:14,581 [indistinct talk on TV] 368 00:18:14,660 --> 00:18:16,420 I mean it, Gallagher. 369 00:18:16,501 --> 00:18:19,101 Don't you mess this up for me. 370 00:18:19,180 --> 00:18:22,781 You're the ones who built your little Sylvanian Family on sand. 371 00:18:23,900 --> 00:18:25,141 Whose fault is that? 372 00:18:25,221 --> 00:18:28,861 I only get to see her every few weeks because Lip can't stand you. 373 00:18:29,861 --> 00:18:32,141 You have poisoned that boy's mind against me. 374 00:18:32,221 --> 00:18:33,621 We used to be like that. 375 00:18:33,700 --> 00:18:35,180 -Really? -Yeah. 376 00:18:35,261 --> 00:18:38,021 So you've been sending him cash, have you? 377 00:18:38,101 --> 00:18:43,061 To help him take care of his little one, each week, into a special account? 378 00:18:44,420 --> 00:18:45,541 Thought not. 379 00:18:45,621 --> 00:18:47,861 He should be taking care of me in my advancing years. 380 00:18:47,940 --> 00:18:52,541 He's got enough problems bringing Katie up, you selfish fuck! 381 00:18:53,900 --> 00:18:57,301 Come on, Slater, we're waiting on that water. 382 00:18:57,381 --> 00:19:00,420 Chop, chop, chop, chop, chop, chop! 383 00:19:00,501 --> 00:19:03,541 Put some elbow grease in it...! 384 00:19:03,621 --> 00:19:06,381 This is no holiday camp, this is the Scouts! 385 00:19:06,461 --> 00:19:08,940 Come on, guys, seriously! It'll be cool! 386 00:19:09,021 --> 00:19:10,101 [cows mooing] 387 00:19:11,461 --> 00:19:12,621 Is it ready? 388 00:19:12,700 --> 00:19:14,940 We can't eat till the billy cans are ready. 389 00:19:15,021 --> 00:19:16,461 Get them in, get them in! 390 00:19:17,501 --> 00:19:19,341 Out the way, out the way! 391 00:19:19,420 --> 00:19:21,420 It's all right, don't panic. 392 00:19:24,101 --> 00:19:26,381 You, Blanco! You! 393 00:19:26,461 --> 00:19:28,061 Oh, shit. 394 00:19:32,021 --> 00:19:33,821 [dog barking in distance] 395 00:19:41,101 --> 00:19:43,261 Fuck me. 396 00:19:43,341 --> 00:19:44,981 Is that still your best chat up line? 397 00:19:45,061 --> 00:19:46,940 Fails every time. 398 00:19:47,021 --> 00:19:48,180 What are you doing here? 399 00:19:48,261 --> 00:19:50,381 Right now, avoiding my piss-soaked dad. 400 00:19:51,541 --> 00:19:53,101 The rest is a long story. 401 00:19:53,180 --> 00:19:55,381 -Coming in? -Nah, you're all right. 402 00:19:55,461 --> 00:19:57,021 Where you going then? 403 00:19:57,101 --> 00:19:58,301 Generally? 404 00:19:58,381 --> 00:20:00,180 Well, come on. 405 00:20:00,261 --> 00:20:03,021 I'll buy you a pint if you promise not to share and care. 406 00:20:04,180 --> 00:20:07,861 Come on, warm beer, shit company, bad entertainment, 407 00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:09,180 don't pretend you haven't missed it, mate. 408 00:20:09,261 --> 00:20:11,021 [sighs] 409 00:20:11,101 --> 00:20:12,501 As long as you're paying. 410 00:20:21,420 --> 00:20:25,221 [people cheering] 411 00:20:26,821 --> 00:20:29,381 [people chattering] 412 00:20:34,781 --> 00:20:35,981 You seen Coggsy? 413 00:20:38,621 --> 00:20:39,700 [camera clicks] 414 00:20:42,660 --> 00:20:43,660 I know I'm good looking, 415 00:20:43,741 --> 00:20:45,501 but you shouldn't be staring at your punters. 416 00:20:45,581 --> 00:20:48,061 Lip Gallagher, all grown up. 417 00:20:48,141 --> 00:20:50,381 Did you start shopping at Next? 418 00:20:50,461 --> 00:20:53,021 You know me, always was a bit of class. 419 00:20:53,101 --> 00:20:55,061 And always full of it. 420 00:20:55,141 --> 00:20:56,541 So you're doing OK I can see. 421 00:20:56,621 --> 00:20:57,981 It's the spirit of Chatsworth. 422 00:20:58,061 --> 00:21:01,621 It'd take more than a global recession to stop this lot having a good time. 423 00:21:01,700 --> 00:21:03,101 -Pint? -Yeah. 424 00:21:09,541 --> 00:21:10,581 Her husband? 425 00:21:12,101 --> 00:21:13,700 Mimi never said owt. 426 00:21:13,781 --> 00:21:15,741 She probably worries you'd judge her. 427 00:21:15,821 --> 00:21:18,221 Some people do, you know, 'cause of the age gap. 428 00:21:18,301 --> 00:21:20,061 It's not for me to say. 429 00:21:20,141 --> 00:21:23,501 But, don't you think it's a bit oedipal? 430 00:21:23,581 --> 00:21:24,621 Edible? 431 00:21:27,660 --> 00:21:29,541 Come to me. 432 00:21:29,621 --> 00:21:31,180 Easy, Lillian, people will be... 433 00:21:32,261 --> 00:21:33,261 talking. 434 00:21:33,341 --> 00:21:35,541 Well, you did always have a way with the ladies. 435 00:21:35,621 --> 00:21:37,541 Never lose it. [giggles] 436 00:21:38,741 --> 00:21:40,821 [indistinct talk on TV] 437 00:21:43,301 --> 00:21:44,381 There you go. 438 00:21:46,781 --> 00:21:48,460 Isn't she a pretty little girl? 439 00:21:48,541 --> 00:21:49,861 She's fine as she was. 440 00:21:49,940 --> 00:21:51,061 Do you think so? 441 00:21:51,141 --> 00:21:54,501 Your grandad's busy watching his show right now, isn't he? 442 00:21:55,261 --> 00:21:57,501 [indistinct talk on TV] 443 00:21:57,581 --> 00:21:58,940 Stop twitching, love. 444 00:22:01,180 --> 00:22:02,981 [indistinct talk on TV continues] 445 00:22:04,541 --> 00:22:06,341 So do you reckon this'll be a regular thing then? 446 00:22:06,420 --> 00:22:08,101 Like fuck. I left for a reason. 447 00:22:08,180 --> 00:22:11,581 Frank's not changed a bit, he's cleaned me out twice, had nearly all of my wages. 448 00:22:11,660 --> 00:22:13,940 And Mimi's just trying to stick her nails right in me. 449 00:22:14,021 --> 00:22:15,700 A simple no was all I wanted. 450 00:22:15,781 --> 00:22:17,741 [giggles] 451 00:22:17,821 --> 00:22:20,221 This is not a good Scout. 452 00:22:20,301 --> 00:22:22,541 -Hey, hands off him! -[Remona] He ruined the camp! 453 00:22:22,621 --> 00:22:24,420 [Esther] I'm sure you're exaggerating. 454 00:22:24,501 --> 00:22:27,741 Look at him. Absolutely no respect for the badge. 455 00:22:32,221 --> 00:22:35,101 What? It's only fucking Scouts. Sit down, have a drink. 456 00:22:35,180 --> 00:22:37,180 -What did you say to him? -Nothing. 457 00:22:37,261 --> 00:22:39,021 You ruined the camp. 458 00:22:41,061 --> 00:22:42,061 What you having? 459 00:22:42,141 --> 00:22:43,180 Gin and tonic. 460 00:22:43,261 --> 00:22:44,460 -Same. -Same. 461 00:22:44,541 --> 00:22:46,460 [Esther] Shut up, you! 462 00:22:46,541 --> 00:22:49,261 Not as easy as we thought, eh? Being a parent. 463 00:22:49,341 --> 00:22:51,101 It's not easy having one, either. 464 00:22:51,180 --> 00:22:52,581 You still turned out OK. 465 00:22:52,660 --> 00:22:53,981 Yeah, not because of him. 466 00:22:54,061 --> 00:22:55,021 Despite. 467 00:22:55,101 --> 00:22:56,221 He has got a job. 468 00:22:56,301 --> 00:22:57,660 So why's he tapping me up? 469 00:22:57,741 --> 00:23:00,261 'Cause he needs it more than you. He's a janny, for God's sake. 470 00:23:00,341 --> 00:23:02,940 You're a big shot architect. 471 00:23:07,021 --> 00:23:08,981 Surveyor's assistant. 472 00:23:10,460 --> 00:23:12,381 I barely scraped my degree, Karen. 473 00:23:12,460 --> 00:23:13,420 I rent. 474 00:23:13,501 --> 00:23:16,021 I shit myself every time a bill comes through the door 475 00:23:16,101 --> 00:23:18,420 and my daughter dresses like a boy. 476 00:23:18,501 --> 00:23:20,581 But I'm still fucking there. 477 00:23:20,660 --> 00:23:22,101 And I'm doing my best. 478 00:23:23,660 --> 00:23:25,341 -Whatever that is. -So is Frank. 479 00:23:25,420 --> 00:23:27,781 I mean, he didn't have to take Aidan on, but he did. 480 00:23:27,861 --> 00:23:29,940 When did you start seeing a halo round his head? 481 00:23:30,021 --> 00:23:32,180 Still sulking like you used to and all? 482 00:23:32,261 --> 00:23:34,101 We know Frank is a selfish bastard, 483 00:23:34,180 --> 00:23:36,381 but I don't think you should let him get to you. 484 00:23:37,621 --> 00:23:40,700 Look, you are not that kid anymore. You're a man! 485 00:23:42,301 --> 00:23:43,301 If you fancy me just say so. 486 00:23:43,381 --> 00:23:45,861 Yeah and still a twat, Phillip Gallagher. 487 00:23:45,940 --> 00:23:47,821 Fuckin' twat... It's a cig machine. 488 00:23:49,301 --> 00:23:50,420 I'm getting off. 489 00:23:50,501 --> 00:23:51,940 [Billy] Oh, c'mon, mate, stay for a few more. 490 00:23:52,021 --> 00:23:53,821 [Shane] Yeah, pool tournament starts in an hour. 491 00:23:53,900 --> 00:23:56,781 No, I've got to get back home. 492 00:23:56,861 --> 00:23:58,981 I mean to Dad's. 493 00:23:59,061 --> 00:24:02,101 It's two steps away from paint stripper, but you know what they say? 494 00:24:02,180 --> 00:24:03,621 Beware Greeks bearing gifts. 495 00:24:05,420 --> 00:24:07,900 I'm just gonna dash next door and put this away. 496 00:24:07,981 --> 00:24:10,021 You be all right with your grandad? 497 00:24:10,101 --> 00:24:11,061 Watch her! 498 00:24:11,141 --> 00:24:12,981 Why, is she going to explode? 499 00:24:13,061 --> 00:24:15,341 [indistinct talk on TV] 500 00:24:25,061 --> 00:24:26,341 I like your hair. 501 00:24:26,420 --> 00:24:27,621 Really? 502 00:24:27,700 --> 00:24:30,781 [indistinct talk on TV continues] 503 00:24:30,861 --> 00:24:33,061 What matters is if you like it, you know. 504 00:24:33,141 --> 00:24:36,301 Don't live your life trying to please others. 505 00:24:36,381 --> 00:24:38,261 You'll only end up messing it up for yourself. 506 00:24:38,341 --> 00:24:40,741 But won't that upset people? 507 00:24:40,821 --> 00:24:44,781 And? We're Gallaghers. We do it our way. 508 00:24:46,621 --> 00:24:48,940 [indistinct talk on TV continues] 509 00:24:50,741 --> 00:24:52,381 I'm glad you killed Bin Laden. 510 00:24:52,460 --> 00:24:54,621 Oh, yeah, me too. He was an awful c-- 511 00:25:03,021 --> 00:25:06,101 [indistinct chatter] 512 00:25:10,341 --> 00:25:11,341 You alright? 513 00:25:11,420 --> 00:25:13,621 [siren wailing in distance] 514 00:25:14,220 --> 00:25:16,180 [indistinct chatter continuous] 515 00:25:16,261 --> 00:25:17,940 [Frank] Look at her, see. 516 00:25:18,021 --> 00:25:22,341 Four of 'em running around trying to give her the wedding of her dreams... 517 00:25:22,420 --> 00:25:26,821 dress, car, pink meringues, you name it. 518 00:25:26,900 --> 00:25:29,180 They're all waiting around like twats to see if she likes it. 519 00:25:29,261 --> 00:25:30,381 And does she? Does she fuck? 520 00:25:30,460 --> 00:25:33,061 She hates it, she hates everything about it. 521 00:25:33,141 --> 00:25:34,900 -And you know what she does? -[door rattles] 522 00:25:34,981 --> 00:25:36,660 She tells them. 523 00:25:36,741 --> 00:25:38,381 And fair play to her. 524 00:25:38,460 --> 00:25:40,381 It's the same with you and this dress. 525 00:25:40,460 --> 00:25:42,581 It's up to you. You choose. 526 00:25:42,660 --> 00:25:43,700 Hi, Dad. 527 00:25:43,781 --> 00:25:44,981 You OK, sweetheart? 528 00:25:46,940 --> 00:25:48,741 Oh. 529 00:25:48,821 --> 00:25:50,621 -That for me? -No. It's for me. 530 00:25:52,180 --> 00:25:54,061 If you've got a clean glass though? 531 00:25:55,141 --> 00:25:56,741 Oh, beware Greeks bearing gifts. 532 00:25:56,821 --> 00:25:58,341 Not you as well. 533 00:26:01,301 --> 00:26:03,141 I was thinking about staying for the weekend. 534 00:26:04,541 --> 00:26:06,700 Well, as long as you're happy to pay board. 535 00:26:07,741 --> 00:26:10,301 I have brought shame both on myself and my office. 536 00:26:10,381 --> 00:26:12,861 Won't they be missing you in middle class suburbia? 537 00:26:14,061 --> 00:26:15,940 It's not as glamorous as you've imagined. 538 00:26:16,021 --> 00:26:18,581 Lord Melrose, who quit his position on Monday, 539 00:26:18,660 --> 00:26:21,501 when it was revealed he had used rent boys... 540 00:26:21,581 --> 00:26:24,541 -It's a fucking real! -He is fucking joke! 541 00:26:24,621 --> 00:26:27,381 Jesus, skeletons in the closet. 542 00:26:27,460 --> 00:26:28,821 At least he's out the closet. 543 00:26:28,900 --> 00:26:32,141 Well, well, and fucking truly now, never going to go back in again. 544 00:26:32,220 --> 00:26:34,101 Think he put it on the expenses? 545 00:26:46,381 --> 00:26:48,460 You moved! 546 00:26:48,541 --> 00:26:50,381 Let's have a look. 547 00:26:50,460 --> 00:26:51,861 Hope you made me look handsome. 548 00:26:53,021 --> 00:26:55,061 Yeah. It's really good. 549 00:26:58,700 --> 00:27:00,420 That's my family box. 550 00:27:06,861 --> 00:27:08,381 You look different now. 551 00:27:09,501 --> 00:27:10,861 Shut up, Stella! 552 00:27:16,741 --> 00:27:18,220 [remembering] Carl! Your tits are ready! 553 00:27:18,301 --> 00:27:20,061 You can pay for a fuck. 554 00:27:20,141 --> 00:27:21,341 Do it your fucking self! 555 00:27:21,420 --> 00:27:22,861 It's not about me, Lip. 556 00:27:22,940 --> 00:27:23,861 It was me. 557 00:27:23,940 --> 00:27:26,101 [kids chattering] 558 00:27:26,180 --> 00:27:27,700 Stella! 559 00:27:27,781 --> 00:27:28,940 Coat on, Stella. 560 00:27:29,021 --> 00:27:30,940 Come here while I get this slide in your hair. 561 00:27:31,021 --> 00:27:32,341 You look like no-one owns you. 562 00:27:33,900 --> 00:27:35,700 We thought we'd take the kids to the park. 563 00:27:35,781 --> 00:27:36,700 Give you a break. 564 00:27:36,781 --> 00:27:38,781 At least let me do breakfast. 565 00:27:38,861 --> 00:27:40,460 I'm quite domesticated these days. 566 00:27:44,900 --> 00:27:45,861 Frank up yet? 567 00:27:45,940 --> 00:27:48,301 He goes next door for breakfast. 568 00:27:48,381 --> 00:27:50,781 He said he didn't want to come with us. 569 00:27:50,861 --> 00:27:52,180 Don't worry, we'll feed them. 570 00:27:52,261 --> 00:27:54,341 Well, I'll stock up whilst you're out. 571 00:27:54,420 --> 00:27:55,420 What's your favourite food? 572 00:27:55,501 --> 00:27:56,420 Chocolate milk. 573 00:27:56,501 --> 00:27:57,581 Yay! Chocolate milk! 574 00:27:57,660 --> 00:28:00,861 Come on, kids! Last one to the swings. 575 00:28:00,940 --> 00:28:03,781 Don't you be sitting around here all day, worrying, neither. 576 00:28:07,180 --> 00:28:08,341 [door shuts] 577 00:28:17,541 --> 00:28:19,061 Do you think it's weird? 578 00:28:19,141 --> 00:28:20,141 What? 579 00:28:20,220 --> 00:28:21,821 Boy George over there. 580 00:28:21,900 --> 00:28:24,341 Well, no other fucker seems to want to face up to it. 581 00:28:24,420 --> 00:28:25,660 Probably just a phase. 582 00:28:25,741 --> 00:28:29,581 I work with kids. I know what I'm talking about. 583 00:28:29,660 --> 00:28:31,541 Just her and him the whole time... 584 00:28:32,861 --> 00:28:34,341 there's no mother figure. 585 00:28:34,420 --> 00:28:35,900 She's unbalanced. 586 00:28:37,021 --> 00:28:41,180 If we keep it nice with Lip and Frank, I could get more time with her, 587 00:28:41,261 --> 00:28:43,900 be that maternal influence. 588 00:28:43,980 --> 00:28:45,700 Maybe she's just different. 589 00:28:45,781 --> 00:28:47,101 A rug muncher? 590 00:28:47,180 --> 00:28:50,061 Do you mean do I think she's a lesbian? I don't know. 591 00:28:50,141 --> 00:28:55,220 I couldn't care less if she grows up to be an Olympic class muff-diver 592 00:28:55,301 --> 00:29:00,420 just so long as she isn't doing the full KD Lang thing at her first holy communion. 593 00:29:00,501 --> 00:29:01,781 I think he's struggling. 594 00:29:01,861 --> 00:29:03,541 [kids chattering] 595 00:29:08,141 --> 00:29:11,381 You always manage to get your feet under the table somewhere. 596 00:29:11,460 --> 00:29:13,141 And I don't have to dress up, either. 597 00:29:13,220 --> 00:29:14,541 Any idea what you look like? 598 00:29:14,621 --> 00:29:16,141 Yeah. 599 00:29:16,220 --> 00:29:17,261 An adult. 600 00:29:17,341 --> 00:29:20,301 Oh, he fills his daughter's head with lies but the twat's wearing a tie, 601 00:29:20,381 --> 00:29:22,660 so he's a fucking adult now. 602 00:29:22,741 --> 00:29:24,341 What's Stella's favourite food, Frank? 603 00:29:26,141 --> 00:29:27,261 Chocolate milk. 604 00:29:28,621 --> 00:29:30,301 So you know. 605 00:29:30,381 --> 00:29:31,700 Just trying to help you. 606 00:29:37,700 --> 00:29:40,660 Like I was on my period out me arse, the blood was gushing. 607 00:29:40,741 --> 00:29:42,460 You didn't help me. 608 00:29:42,541 --> 00:29:43,621 Oh, here he is. 609 00:29:43,700 --> 00:29:44,821 Got your Chatsworth on. 610 00:29:44,900 --> 00:29:47,501 Yay! 611 00:29:49,180 --> 00:29:50,301 I wasn't going to say anything before 612 00:29:50,381 --> 00:29:52,021 but you did look like a right twat in that suit. 613 00:29:52,101 --> 00:29:53,381 Don't hold back. 614 00:29:53,460 --> 00:29:55,741 I wasn't. Come on. Let's go fuck shit up! 615 00:29:55,821 --> 00:29:56,900 Oh, my god. 616 00:29:58,700 --> 00:30:00,501 Ugh, man! 617 00:30:00,581 --> 00:30:01,700 Believe me-- 618 00:30:01,781 --> 00:30:02,741 He's in! 619 00:30:02,821 --> 00:30:04,301 Go on, son! 620 00:30:04,381 --> 00:30:05,781 Is it not like this round your way, then? 621 00:30:05,861 --> 00:30:07,460 -How do you mean? -Like it's posh, innit? 622 00:30:07,541 --> 00:30:09,021 Like big swanky apartments. 623 00:30:09,101 --> 00:30:10,460 Nah. 624 00:30:10,541 --> 00:30:11,821 It's not that swanky an apartment. 625 00:30:11,900 --> 00:30:13,660 Come to check out my arse, paedo? 626 00:30:14,781 --> 00:30:17,341 Oh, fuck off. Who'd paedo you? 627 00:30:17,420 --> 00:30:18,700 Give us that. Come on. 628 00:30:18,781 --> 00:30:20,101 He's definitely got something. 629 00:30:20,180 --> 00:30:23,940 Specialised market for goggle eyes and acne. 630 00:30:24,021 --> 00:30:25,581 Come on, darling, make love to the camera. 631 00:30:25,660 --> 00:30:26,861 Fuckin' paedo... 632 00:30:26,940 --> 00:30:28,741 That's it, work it, baby! 633 00:30:28,821 --> 00:30:29,781 Hoi! 634 00:30:29,861 --> 00:30:31,861 Hey, Dad, come check out these paedos! 635 00:30:31,940 --> 00:30:32,980 Fucking perverts! 636 00:30:33,061 --> 00:30:35,741 Even if I was a pervert, I wouldn't touch him! 637 00:30:35,821 --> 00:30:36,781 That's fucking it! 638 00:30:36,861 --> 00:30:38,900 [laughter] 639 00:30:53,261 --> 00:30:54,861 I'm gonna kill you! Wait! 640 00:30:58,621 --> 00:30:59,621 [door shuts] 641 00:31:02,821 --> 00:31:08,460 Having expended all his energy swimming upstream for no reason at all, 642 00:31:08,541 --> 00:31:13,821 the Chatsworth male eventually stops fighting it and goes with the flow, 643 00:31:13,900 --> 00:31:19,021 back to the spawning ground to occupy his correct place in society. 644 00:31:19,101 --> 00:31:20,381 [gasps] 645 00:31:20,460 --> 00:31:21,621 Order is restored. 646 00:31:21,700 --> 00:31:22,621 Drink. 647 00:31:22,700 --> 00:31:23,660 I need the toilet. 648 00:31:23,741 --> 00:31:25,700 Go on, then, upstairs to the toilet. 649 00:31:27,061 --> 00:31:28,180 Nice look. 650 00:31:28,261 --> 00:31:29,980 Temporary. 651 00:31:30,061 --> 00:31:31,220 How was that then, sweetheart? 652 00:31:31,301 --> 00:31:32,741 Great. 653 00:31:32,821 --> 00:31:37,180 We were thinking it might be nice to spend a bit of time together as a family. 654 00:31:37,261 --> 00:31:40,581 -Jockey later? -Yeah, OK. 655 00:31:40,660 --> 00:31:43,021 Granddad, will you come with us? 656 00:31:43,101 --> 00:31:46,581 Well, I'm not feeling too good. 657 00:31:46,660 --> 00:31:48,341 You know, might have to take a rain check. 658 00:31:48,420 --> 00:31:50,420 Old war wounds. 659 00:31:50,501 --> 00:31:52,061 Better give your granddad some peace and quiet. 660 00:31:52,141 --> 00:31:53,660 Yeah, let's get a cup of tea. 661 00:31:53,740 --> 00:31:54,821 He's all talked out. 662 00:31:57,501 --> 00:32:00,220 Ground control to Major Tom. We have liftoff. 663 00:32:03,781 --> 00:32:05,381 Ah, you. 664 00:32:05,460 --> 00:32:06,700 Listen, mate. 665 00:32:06,781 --> 00:32:07,781 I'm sorry about earlier. 666 00:32:07,861 --> 00:32:09,101 We were just having a laugh. 667 00:32:09,180 --> 00:32:10,381 I was being a dick. 668 00:32:11,660 --> 00:32:13,021 Please accept my apology. 669 00:32:15,061 --> 00:32:16,781 Yeah, sure. 670 00:32:20,821 --> 00:32:22,101 [Lip groans] 671 00:32:22,180 --> 00:32:24,501 Just go around picking up fucking kiddies, do you? 672 00:32:25,740 --> 00:32:27,061 Katie, run now! 673 00:32:27,141 --> 00:32:29,381 [groans] 674 00:32:36,341 --> 00:32:37,501 You OK? 675 00:32:49,660 --> 00:32:51,180 Take cover! 676 00:32:51,261 --> 00:32:53,581 [laughter] 677 00:32:53,660 --> 00:32:55,101 Bandits at six o'clock! 678 00:33:02,581 --> 00:33:04,980 Ow, ow! 679 00:33:06,220 --> 00:33:07,700 Fuck's sake. Hold on. 680 00:33:10,021 --> 00:33:11,261 -What? -Ow! 681 00:33:11,341 --> 00:33:12,980 I think I've got a splinter. 682 00:33:16,581 --> 00:33:18,700 She was terrified. 683 00:33:18,781 --> 00:33:19,900 I should never have brought her here. 684 00:33:19,980 --> 00:33:21,021 [groans] 685 00:33:21,101 --> 00:33:22,700 Are we really that bad? 686 00:33:22,781 --> 00:33:24,581 -I'm messing up. -You're not. 687 00:33:24,660 --> 00:33:26,301 She's a great kid. 688 00:33:26,381 --> 00:33:28,700 She came here, met our lot and coped. Like you did. 689 00:33:28,781 --> 00:33:30,541 This is coping? 690 00:33:30,621 --> 00:33:32,541 What if I'm getting it all wrong? 691 00:33:32,621 --> 00:33:34,101 What about the way she dresses? 692 00:33:35,141 --> 00:33:36,180 Is she happy? 693 00:33:37,420 --> 00:33:38,900 How do I know if she's happy? 694 00:33:38,980 --> 00:33:40,141 Are you happy? 695 00:33:46,980 --> 00:33:48,021 Oh, Lip. 696 00:33:50,501 --> 00:33:51,541 Sorry. 697 00:33:57,301 --> 00:33:58,781 Sorry, Frank. 698 00:33:58,861 --> 00:34:01,180 Can't seem to stop crying. 699 00:34:01,261 --> 00:34:03,940 It's Biddy, won't come near me. 700 00:34:04,021 --> 00:34:06,381 Hasn't humped me or thumped me for days. 701 00:34:06,460 --> 00:34:08,260 Ow! 702 00:34:08,340 --> 00:34:09,820 Got it. 703 00:34:09,901 --> 00:34:11,541 Big bastard that. 704 00:34:11,621 --> 00:34:13,101 Have I lost it, Frank? 705 00:34:13,180 --> 00:34:14,901 Never, my little bandit. 706 00:34:17,860 --> 00:34:19,381 What's the matter with you now? 707 00:34:20,461 --> 00:34:22,700 Sympathy pains. 708 00:34:22,780 --> 00:34:24,740 [sobs] 709 00:34:27,300 --> 00:34:29,260 Katie's fine. 710 00:34:29,340 --> 00:34:31,101 Mam and Shane are regaling her with stories of... 711 00:34:32,461 --> 00:34:33,421 something funny. 712 00:34:33,501 --> 00:34:35,141 [sighs] 713 00:34:35,220 --> 00:34:36,340 Thanks. 714 00:34:38,180 --> 00:34:41,780 Right, better be getting Katie back home. 715 00:34:41,860 --> 00:34:44,860 Lip, she's got a family here. You both have. 716 00:34:44,941 --> 00:34:46,700 You are putting all this pressure on yourself. 717 00:34:46,780 --> 00:34:48,820 This daft lie with Frank. 718 00:34:48,901 --> 00:34:52,700 He's a shit, so what? You do not let him cost you all of us. 719 00:34:54,981 --> 00:34:56,141 Thanks. 720 00:35:05,661 --> 00:35:06,741 [man] Coggsy! 721 00:35:08,141 --> 00:35:10,261 He won't come back, will he? 722 00:35:10,340 --> 00:35:12,101 No, sweetheart. 723 00:35:12,181 --> 00:35:14,541 Uncle Jamie chased him away. 724 00:35:14,621 --> 00:35:19,021 I like Jamie and Karen and Billy. 725 00:35:19,101 --> 00:35:20,501 I like them all. 726 00:35:22,221 --> 00:35:23,501 They like you, too. 727 00:35:25,021 --> 00:35:28,741 -Your orders: if you choose to accept-- -Frank. 728 00:35:28,820 --> 00:35:31,181 No talking in line, soldier. 729 00:35:31,261 --> 00:35:32,421 Frank! 730 00:35:33,461 --> 00:35:35,141 What the fuck's going on? 731 00:35:37,981 --> 00:35:38,941 Oh, come on-- 732 00:35:39,021 --> 00:35:40,461 [both] No, Frank! 733 00:35:40,541 --> 00:35:42,101 No, we've got morals! 734 00:35:42,181 --> 00:35:43,780 He doesn't even live here! 735 00:35:47,741 --> 00:35:49,340 Thank you very fucking much. 736 00:35:49,421 --> 00:35:51,141 Oh, you're angry at us? 737 00:35:51,221 --> 00:35:55,701 A working man gets one day a week to spend his hard-earned money as he sees fit 738 00:35:55,780 --> 00:35:59,381 and the disappointing fruit of his loins comes along and fucks it up. 739 00:35:59,461 --> 00:36:01,941 I need to speak to Katie, alone. 740 00:36:02,021 --> 00:36:03,340 Well, I'm out of pocket now, 741 00:36:03,421 --> 00:36:04,820 so bung us a tenner, I'll be out your hair. 742 00:36:04,901 --> 00:36:07,860 I haven't got any! You've had the last of my wages. 743 00:36:07,941 --> 00:36:11,181 Granddad, why have you got your uniform on? 744 00:36:11,261 --> 00:36:12,901 Do you have to go back? 745 00:36:12,981 --> 00:36:14,541 No, love. 746 00:36:14,621 --> 00:36:17,541 And let's get one thing straight. 747 00:36:17,621 --> 00:36:22,300 I am not, and have never been part of Her Majesty's armed forces. 748 00:36:22,381 --> 00:36:24,860 Your dad lied to you! 749 00:36:24,941 --> 00:36:27,181 Every night you were praying, hoping I'd come back? 750 00:36:27,261 --> 00:36:30,820 I was always here, only one bus ride away! 751 00:36:30,901 --> 00:36:34,421 Take my advice: don't believe a word he tells you, ever again! 752 00:36:34,501 --> 00:36:35,661 He's full of it. 753 00:36:38,300 --> 00:36:40,581 Is that it, then? You just drop a bomb and walk off? 754 00:36:40,661 --> 00:36:42,461 Combat references. How appropriate. 755 00:36:42,541 --> 00:36:43,501 You're a cunt. 756 00:36:43,581 --> 00:36:45,581 Hey, you're all still alive! 757 00:36:45,661 --> 00:36:48,221 Her up the road's got three dead. Go and call her a cunt! 758 00:36:48,300 --> 00:36:51,221 I thought the job was over once you'd pulled your dick out? 759 00:36:51,300 --> 00:36:52,380 You're repulsive. 760 00:36:52,461 --> 00:36:54,461 You're fucking disgusting! 761 00:36:54,541 --> 00:36:56,661 You gave me nothing! 762 00:36:56,741 --> 00:36:58,380 What the fuck do you want? 763 00:36:59,860 --> 00:37:02,501 Ever since you arrived, you've been sorry for yourself, 764 00:37:02,581 --> 00:37:05,661 desperation oozing out of every insignificant, 765 00:37:05,741 --> 00:37:07,780 under-achieving little pore! 766 00:37:07,860 --> 00:37:09,141 [thud] 767 00:37:12,380 --> 00:37:14,141 I did give you something. 768 00:37:14,221 --> 00:37:17,541 I gave you fucking freedom and you can't even use it 769 00:37:17,621 --> 00:37:21,380 because everything you do, every decision you make is about me, isn't it? 770 00:37:21,461 --> 00:37:22,860 You carry me up here. 771 00:37:22,941 --> 00:37:24,741 Yeah, keep fucking walking. 772 00:37:24,820 --> 00:37:26,741 I'm with you every single step! 773 00:37:32,701 --> 00:37:34,820 [indistinct talk on TV] 774 00:37:34,901 --> 00:37:36,780 [chuckles] 775 00:37:39,501 --> 00:37:42,661 Oi, Zippy and Bungle. Nearly did meself an injury there. 776 00:37:42,741 --> 00:37:43,701 Where's your Dad? 777 00:37:43,780 --> 00:37:44,941 Dunno, not here. 778 00:37:45,021 --> 00:37:47,181 Lucky bastard. I'm off to have me breakfast. 779 00:37:50,661 --> 00:37:52,981 [siren wailing in distance] 780 00:37:56,101 --> 00:37:57,780 [Karen] Oh, there you are. 781 00:37:59,300 --> 00:38:00,421 Your breakfast's ready. 782 00:38:06,181 --> 00:38:08,501 All right! Fucking coming! 783 00:38:11,461 --> 00:38:12,541 Can I help you, sir? 784 00:38:12,621 --> 00:38:14,421 You not got a home to go to? 785 00:38:14,501 --> 00:38:15,621 Ha-ha, very funny. 786 00:38:18,541 --> 00:38:20,021 Do us a pint. 787 00:38:20,101 --> 00:38:21,021 Trying it out for size? 788 00:38:21,101 --> 00:38:23,380 I could do without a lesson in morals from you. 789 00:38:23,461 --> 00:38:24,820 It's been a hard night, OK? 790 00:38:24,901 --> 00:38:26,541 If it looks like a tramp and smells like a tramp. 791 00:38:26,621 --> 00:38:27,541 I don't want to talk about it. 792 00:38:27,621 --> 00:38:29,820 Well, then why are you hammering my door down at the crack of the arse? 793 00:38:29,901 --> 00:38:31,901 You might not want to talk, but you're gonna fucking listen. 794 00:38:31,981 --> 00:38:33,181 Graduate of Mimi Maguire's School of Counselling-- 795 00:38:33,261 --> 00:38:34,860 Look at the state of you, Lip! 796 00:38:34,941 --> 00:38:37,101 You've been back 48 hours and you're a fucking mess! 797 00:38:37,181 --> 00:38:39,901 I am embracing my fine heritage. 798 00:38:39,981 --> 00:38:42,421 You was the one who told me to go out and have a bit of fun. 799 00:38:42,501 --> 00:38:44,820 And it looks like you're laughing it right up. 800 00:38:44,901 --> 00:38:47,941 Oh, and while you were out last night embracing your fine heritage, 801 00:38:48,021 --> 00:38:49,941 have you any idea where your daughter is? 802 00:38:55,221 --> 00:38:56,221 [door shuts heavily] 803 00:38:56,300 --> 00:38:57,261 Where's your dad? 804 00:38:57,340 --> 00:38:59,380 He's not here. Lucky bastard. 805 00:38:59,461 --> 00:39:00,621 He didn't come home. 806 00:39:01,860 --> 00:39:03,661 OK, sweetheart, you're coming back with me. 807 00:39:03,741 --> 00:39:04,741 Shouldn't I stay here with her? 808 00:39:04,820 --> 00:39:05,860 Come on! 809 00:39:07,780 --> 00:39:10,340 Orphan Annie there ain't my problem. 810 00:39:10,421 --> 00:39:14,741 No granddaughter of mine is living in this shit tip like this any longer. 811 00:39:16,340 --> 00:39:17,380 See ya! 812 00:39:19,461 --> 00:39:21,221 [door closes] 813 00:39:22,860 --> 00:39:27,181 If there's a lesson I can give you, it's that men are thick as fuck. 814 00:39:27,261 --> 00:39:30,701 That's how I know it must be hard, only having your dad to talk to. 815 00:39:33,501 --> 00:39:36,380 I can see why you've made the choices you've made. 816 00:39:37,581 --> 00:39:41,541 It's just that carrying on like this isn't helping anyone. 817 00:39:41,621 --> 00:39:45,461 It's not your fault, love, having the dad you've got. 818 00:39:49,061 --> 00:39:50,461 I picked this up for you. 819 00:39:55,261 --> 00:39:56,780 Pretty, isn't it? 820 00:39:56,860 --> 00:39:59,101 None of us wants to be a boy. 821 00:39:59,181 --> 00:40:02,901 Imagine going through life being one of those lanky streaks of piss. 822 00:40:02,981 --> 00:40:04,780 Why don't we try it, eh? 823 00:40:04,860 --> 00:40:05,981 See how it feels? 824 00:40:17,141 --> 00:40:18,261 Do you want something? 825 00:40:19,421 --> 00:40:22,701 Or is acting creepy as fuck another one of your quirks? 826 00:40:22,780 --> 00:40:25,261 Just watching a leader at work. 827 00:40:25,340 --> 00:40:27,300 More afternoon drinking with Frank, is it? 828 00:40:27,380 --> 00:40:29,860 You need to deal with this Scouts business. 829 00:40:29,941 --> 00:40:32,981 I'll talk to Remona, offer to pay for any cow damage. 830 00:40:33,061 --> 00:40:34,860 I meant with Saul! 831 00:40:34,941 --> 00:40:36,141 He'll get over it, kids do. 832 00:40:36,221 --> 00:40:38,061 He shouldn't have to get over it. 833 00:40:38,141 --> 00:40:40,461 Scouts is something he wanted to do. 834 00:40:40,541 --> 00:40:43,581 Before Uncle Big Balls came along and wasted it for him. 835 00:40:43,661 --> 00:40:45,300 That wasn't my intention. 836 00:40:45,380 --> 00:40:48,300 You made him feel like a twat so he acted like one. 837 00:40:48,380 --> 00:40:52,661 So now you and your big swinging ball sack need to sort it. 838 00:40:55,340 --> 00:40:59,061 Oh, you look gorgeous. 839 00:40:59,141 --> 00:41:00,421 [inaudible] 840 00:41:01,221 --> 00:41:02,621 [door opens] 841 00:41:03,860 --> 00:41:05,101 Me and Katie have been having a great time. 842 00:41:05,181 --> 00:41:07,021 Take it off, love. We're going home. 843 00:41:07,101 --> 00:41:08,181 Stay as you are. 844 00:41:08,261 --> 00:41:10,221 I think your dad here's a little bit confused. 845 00:41:10,300 --> 00:41:12,981 You can't just stick her in a dress, Mimi. 846 00:41:13,061 --> 00:41:14,820 She's not bloody Barbie! 847 00:41:14,901 --> 00:41:16,421 No, she thinks she's fucking Ken. 848 00:41:16,501 --> 00:41:19,820 Take the dress off! 849 00:41:24,701 --> 00:41:26,941 [indistinct talk on TV] 850 00:41:28,380 --> 00:41:31,021 The prodigal son trick is to go back the once. 851 00:41:31,101 --> 00:41:33,461 Law of diminishing returns with you. 852 00:41:33,541 --> 00:41:34,621 We're leaving. 853 00:41:35,860 --> 00:41:39,340 Oh, he's come back to tell us he's going away. 854 00:41:39,421 --> 00:41:42,141 I'm sorry. Again. 855 00:41:42,221 --> 00:41:43,661 It's OK. 856 00:41:43,741 --> 00:41:44,741 Don't worry. 857 00:41:44,820 --> 00:41:47,661 He'll be back when the next existential crisis hits him. 858 00:41:47,741 --> 00:41:50,101 Another failure to hang on his poor old dad. 859 00:41:50,181 --> 00:41:51,741 It's Katie's communion next week. 860 00:41:53,541 --> 00:41:55,141 I won't stop you coming. 861 00:41:55,221 --> 00:41:59,340 Well, bear with me while I deal with the overwhelming emotion of the moment. 862 00:42:04,061 --> 00:42:05,221 Come on, sweetheart. 863 00:42:18,181 --> 00:42:20,300 Oh, sloppy work, Nazir. 864 00:42:20,380 --> 00:42:21,421 I could blow that one down myself. 865 00:42:21,501 --> 00:42:23,061 Go, get me cows! 866 00:42:23,141 --> 00:42:25,141 -You said cows? -Now then, boys, look. 867 00:42:25,221 --> 00:42:27,501 This is how it should be done. 868 00:42:27,581 --> 00:42:29,901 Well, Baloo helped me. 869 00:42:29,981 --> 00:42:31,541 Well done, Baloo. 870 00:42:32,860 --> 00:42:36,581 [all] Well done, Baloo! 871 00:42:36,661 --> 00:42:40,661 Well done to you! Well done, Baloo! 872 00:42:40,741 --> 00:42:42,021 Well done to you! 873 00:42:42,101 --> 00:42:43,941 [thunder rumbles] 874 00:42:53,860 --> 00:42:56,741 [church bell chiming] 875 00:42:58,380 --> 00:43:00,461 [people chattering] 876 00:43:03,061 --> 00:43:05,261 Oh, the camera loves you. 877 00:43:05,340 --> 00:43:08,981 [Mimi] State of them, they're supposed to be marrying the baby Jesus. 878 00:43:12,461 --> 00:43:14,421 Oh, will you look at that? 879 00:43:14,501 --> 00:43:15,741 She's like an angel. 880 00:43:17,101 --> 00:43:19,141 It's not too late to change your mind, you know. 881 00:43:19,221 --> 00:43:20,421 Well, it makes Nana happy. 882 00:43:22,101 --> 00:43:25,141 That's no reason to do something if it makes you feel uncomfortable. 883 00:43:26,300 --> 00:43:27,981 [people chattering] 884 00:43:28,061 --> 00:43:30,501 Grandad said we're Gallaghers, we do it our own way. 885 00:43:30,581 --> 00:43:33,021 Yeah. That's usually the bloody hard way. 886 00:43:36,101 --> 00:43:38,661 Hiya, gorgeous. 887 00:43:38,741 --> 00:43:40,581 Hiya, sweetheart. 888 00:43:40,661 --> 00:43:41,621 -Hey, mate. -Mwah. 889 00:43:41,701 --> 00:43:42,981 You look fabulous. 890 00:43:43,061 --> 00:43:45,741 [Shane] You got off lightly, she were going to make you wear this. 891 00:43:46,900 --> 00:43:48,780 [Lip] Love your shoes. 892 00:43:48,860 --> 00:43:49,820 She's pretty. 893 00:43:49,900 --> 00:43:51,300 Let's do it. 894 00:43:51,380 --> 00:43:52,860 [indistinct talk] 895 00:43:52,941 --> 00:43:54,181 [Shane] Give me something. 896 00:43:54,261 --> 00:43:55,221 Frank? 897 00:43:55,300 --> 00:43:56,340 He knows it's on. 898 00:44:11,181 --> 00:44:13,581 You may enter the boardroom. 899 00:44:16,621 --> 00:44:18,300 [Lip] Now in the 17th century, 900 00:44:18,380 --> 00:44:21,900 your parents might have handed you off to a wet nurse, 901 00:44:21,981 --> 00:44:25,461 that's a woman who breastfeeds you so your ma doesn't have to. 902 00:44:25,541 --> 00:44:27,501 I mean, that's brilliant! 903 00:44:27,581 --> 00:44:30,741 Spend your early years sucking on a stranger's tits. 904 00:44:30,820 --> 00:44:33,021 And meanwhile, Dad just stands there, 905 00:44:33,101 --> 00:44:35,300 the spare prick at the wedding, so to speak. 906 00:44:36,501 --> 00:44:40,541 Because we never have that same bond that mothers do. 907 00:44:40,621 --> 00:44:43,621 We never carry the little ones around inside us. 908 00:44:43,701 --> 00:44:46,340 [Frank] The job's more or less finished after you've pulled your dick out. 909 00:44:46,421 --> 00:44:49,340 [Lip] Except it's not. And that's the big secret, isn't it? 910 00:44:49,421 --> 00:44:51,501 [Frank] We're terrified of our kids. 911 00:44:51,581 --> 00:44:54,541 Little strangers taking over our lives. 912 00:44:56,621 --> 00:44:58,941 [Lip] We don't always fuck up because we're twats. 913 00:44:59,021 --> 00:45:01,541 [Frank] It's because we don't know what else to do. 914 00:45:05,181 --> 00:45:08,661 So thank fuck for the extended family. 915 00:45:08,741 --> 00:45:10,541 Well, most of 'em anyway. 916 00:45:12,141 --> 00:45:14,820 [Randall] You know I need to hear it, those three little words. 917 00:45:14,900 --> 00:45:16,021 I'm here to see Remona. 918 00:45:16,101 --> 00:45:17,101 Piss off, Dad. 919 00:45:17,181 --> 00:45:18,941 [Randall] A little secret between you and her? 920 00:45:19,021 --> 00:45:20,461 For fuck's sake. 921 00:45:20,541 --> 00:45:24,221 [Randall] I am tired of seeing her buzzing around you like a fly on shit. 922 00:45:24,300 --> 00:45:25,221 What are you doing here? 923 00:45:25,300 --> 00:45:26,701 He's taken me passport. 924 00:45:26,780 --> 00:45:28,421 If I'm going to get her out of here, 925 00:45:28,501 --> 00:45:32,101 I need you to get him off our backs while I do it. 926 00:45:32,181 --> 00:45:33,780 He's not doing it for love, is he? 927 00:45:33,860 --> 00:45:36,340 Come on, you've got a plane to catch. 928 00:45:36,421 --> 00:45:37,300 You're not going anywhere. 929 00:46:17,621 --> 00:46:23,780 [Jamie] ♪ Kumbaya, my Lord, kumbaya ♪ 930 00:46:23,860 --> 00:46:28,101 ♪ Kumbaya, my Lord, kumbaya ♪ 931 00:46:28,181 --> 00:46:29,380 All right, Baloo? 932 00:46:29,461 --> 00:46:31,021 You're not scared, are you? 933 00:46:37,061 --> 00:46:40,021 Touch me and I'll cut your hands off. 934 00:46:42,380 --> 00:46:43,501 [turns off] 935 00:46:43,581 --> 00:46:45,061 [Remona] Sleep tight.